April 23 - "Blood"

“Blood”
by Zdravka Evtimova
New Sudden Fiction (2007)

* * * (Good) Realistic

An old woman stumbles into a man’s shop looking for the blood of a mole to help cure her sick son. The storekeeper has no moles, but cannot allow the woman to leave without the blood she so desperately seeks.

Evtimova writes with an over abundance of similes. When used effectively, similes can punch up the imagery of a piece. However, when used too frequently, the attempt becomes apparent and the reader is pulled out of the story, and the image the writer was trying so hard to create fades. And this is sad because there’s a great story hidden behind the technical missteps. The piece reads as though it may have been translated from another language (there is no indication that this is the case), and possibly the awkwardness of the sentences is due in some small degree to an unfamiliarity with the English language. Something just feels a bit off throughout.